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Sleep train求助！

Sleep train求助！# NextGeneration - 我爱宝宝

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

1 楼

娃四个多月了，一直是大人轮流抱着哄睡，睡眠很不规律。现在爷爷奶奶回国了，想
sleep train，已经尝试了三天，第一天哭了四十多分钟，第二天晚上三十多分钟睡着
，我正高兴说有进步呢，结果今晚比昨天晚上没有丝毫改变，仍然是哭三十多分钟才睡
着，而且小家伙嗓子都哭哑了，当妈的我心里真不是滋味啊，不知道该不该进行下去，
如果这是个strong will的娃，岂不是根本没法训呢？他到了今晚就似乎像知道要被一
个人关屋子里一样，喂完奶紧紧抓住我的衣服一脸“不要放我去小黑屋”的表情
睡前是喂奶加洗澡，他哭的过程中我们会十五分钟去看看他，拍拍脑袋，电吹风给吹吹
身上出的汗，然后亲亲小脸再离开，不知道还有什么可以做的能让他明白他需要学会自
己入睡？

a*h2015-01-23 08:01

2 楼

我们马上5个月了。之前train过，不彻底，心软的时候就又哄睡了，结果几个星期以后
又回到白天抱着才能睡得久，晚上频繁醒。所以这两天又train呢。发现睡前情绪好可
能，似乎，好像，有点帮助。。。就是把他扔小床之前使劲抱着亲热，唱歌说话逗开心
，然后一遍遍地啰嗦说宝宝要自己睡，妈妈不抱了。放倒以后搂着脑袋又是一阵亲，搞
得他咯咯笑。然后关灯走开。结果他自己咕咕囊囊就睡过去了，过了几分钟又醒过来，
哭了几下又睡了，远远没前两天那么凄惨。也不知道是之前的training已经见效了还是
怎么的。。。
要不lz你验证看看到底这招是不是有用。期待反馈啊！

【在 l*****h 的大作中提到】

: 娃四个多月了，一直是大人轮流抱着哄睡，睡眠很不规律。现在爷爷奶奶回国了，想
: sleep train，已经尝试了三天，第一天哭了四十多分钟，第二天晚上三十多分钟睡着
: ，我正高兴说有进步呢，结果今晚比昨天晚上没有丝毫改变，仍然是哭三十多分钟才睡
: 着，而且小家伙嗓子都哭哑了，当妈的我心里真不是滋味啊，不知道该不该进行下去，
: 如果这是个strong will的娃，岂不是根本没法训呢？他到了今晚就似乎像知道要被一
: 个人关屋子里一样，喂完奶紧紧抓住我的衣服一脸“不要放我去小黑屋”的表情
: 睡前是喂奶加洗澡，他哭的过程中我们会十五分钟去看看他，拍拍脑袋，电吹风给吹吹
: 身上出的汗，然后亲亲小脸再离开，不知道还有什么可以做的能让他明白他需要学会自
: 己入睡？

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

3 楼

其实我们也是尽量让他进crib 之前心情好点啊，抱着逗开心，亲小脸蛋，他也很高兴
得咯咯笑，就是每天进步不显著，我打算试一周看看情况，如果一点都没变化，那我就
默认这是个没法train的strong-will娃了

【在 a**h 的大作中提到】

: 我们马上5个月了。之前train过，不彻底，心软的时候就又哄睡了，结果几个星期以后
: 又回到白天抱着才能睡得久，晚上频繁醒。所以这两天又train呢。发现睡前情绪好可
: 能，似乎，好像，有点帮助。。。就是把他扔小床之前使劲抱着亲热，唱歌说话逗开心
: ，然后一遍遍地啰嗦说宝宝要自己睡，妈妈不抱了。放倒以后搂着脑袋又是一阵亲，搞
: 得他咯咯笑。然后关灯走开。结果他自己咕咕囊囊就睡过去了，过了几分钟又醒过来，
: 哭了几下又睡了，远远没前两天那么凄惨。也不知道是之前的training已经见效了还是
: 怎么的。。。
: 要不lz你验证看看到底这招是不是有用。期待反馈啊！

R*i2015-01-23 08:01

4 楼

从来舍不得孩子哭着入睡...

f*42015-01-23 08:01

5 楼

白天晚上宝宝要睡了我放他在床上，如果从哼哼唧唧到开始哭，就是他不打算睡了。
你要真想training ，得有个坚定的耳朵

c*e2015-01-23 08:01

6 楼

进步没那么快很正常的，之后会反复也是正常的，不代表就是strong will。
我们娃超级strong will之前也训成功了。

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

7 楼

Sleep training is composed of many different things, crying is just one of
them (or to be exact, one of the steps to break the old habit while
establishing the new habit). However, all the elements are needed.
According to Dr. Ferber, the author of
, over his career, he had never seen any child would need more than 3 nights
to establish the new habit, unless a child with medical needs.
To name a few of the elements from Dr. Ferber's book:
1. How long your child sleeps every day, that includes the cat napping in
the car, and does not include the wake time he has during night
2. Your child's routing, what time is his bed time? Is 9PM the time you put
him down, or the time you started to rock him to hopefully make him go to
sleep? If the later one, then 9PM is NOT his bed time, it's the desired bed
time. His routing is sometime later, then when?
3. The sleep training is recommended to start 30 min later than your child
regular bed time.
4. Does your child have limit setting problem? i.e., who is the boss in your
family, you or your child?
5. Is the entire family on board with the sleep training plan? If not, don't
do it. If you do, you are torturing your child.
6. If your final goal is to have child falls to sleep on his own, and sleep
in his own bed and in his own room, then it's best to do one big change,
rather than several small changes, for your child's sake. We, the adults,
are the ones who are less adaptable to the changes, not the child. Children
are the master of adapting changes.
7. While your child is crying / protesting prior to falling sleep, if you
choose to check on him in an increased interval, make sure your visits are
brief, and do not include physical contact, eye contact, or any talks.
8. While your child is crying / protesting prior to falling sleep, if you
choose to not check on him, i.e., cold turkey, it's the most effective way,
meaning that the child's overall crying time is the least.
9. During daytime napping, if your child was to cry or fuzz longer than 30
min and still does not want to go to sleep, you will eliminate that nap time
for him, and he is not to make up the sleep time he lost later.
10. If your child's routine is to wake up at 7AM (prior to the training),
then you ought to wake him up if he hasn't no later than 7AM, so that he
will not make up the sleep time he lost the previous night.
There are more which you can get from the book if you'd like.
In his book, never a single kid had to take more than 3 nights to learn to
fall to sleep.
He also mentioned that when a child is sick, you'll give him/her the care
and tend he/she desires.
However, once the sickness is gone, you shall "bring the order back to the
house".

【在 l*****h 的大作中提到】

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

8 楼

我纠结的很啊

【在 R*********i 的大作中提到】

: 从来舍不得孩子哭着入睡...

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

9 楼

嗯…

【在 f*****4 的大作中提到】

: 白天晚上宝宝要睡了我放他在床上，如果从哼哼唧唧到开始哭，就是他不打算睡了。
: 你要真想training ，得有个坚定的耳朵

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

10 楼

多谢鼓励，我再坚持坚持

【在 c********e 的大作中提到】

: 进步没那么快很正常的，之后会反复也是正常的，不代表就是strong will。
: 我们娃超级strong will之前也训成功了。

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

11 楼

多谢科普，只是不明白为什么训练要开始的比他的bedtime迟呢？

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: Sleep training is composed of many different things, crying is just one of
: them (or to be exact, one of the steps to break the old habit while
: establishing the new habit). However, all the elements are needed.
: According to Dr. Ferber, the author of
: , over his career, he had never seen any child would need more than 3 nights
: to establish the new habit, unless a child with medical needs.
: To name a few of the elements from Dr. Ferber's book:
: 1. How long your child sleeps every day, that includes the cat napping in
: the car, and does not include the wake time he has during night
: 2. Your child's routing, what time is his bed time? Is 9PM the time you put

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

12 楼

to start the training 30 min later then his regular bedtime is for your and
your child benefit. with 30 min delay, he is tired already. as a consequence
, it will be sooner, therefore less crying, before finally sleepness takes
over crying. it's easier for everyone.
one thing you should trust is: sleeping is necessary for every human,
regardless of age.
at the beginning, your child may want to go back to the old sleeping habit,
this desire may dominate him for a bit, but, eventually, sleepness will
catch up, that's when he starts to learn how to fall sleep on his own.

【在 l*****h 的大作中提到】

: 多谢科普，只是不明白为什么训练要开始的比他的bedtime迟呢？

x*a2015-01-23 08:01

13 楼

这位美妈看起来很有经验啊，我搭车问个问题：我家娃现在晚上已经训好了，完全自己
入睡加睡整觉，但是我很担心他以后生病啊或是打疫苗了不舒服，我该怎么处理呢？看
你上面说应该在生病期间该怎么照顾就怎么照顾，那就是说晚上如果他不舒服，闹，那
么我还是要抱，如果他实在难受，我可能还要一直抱睡。但是这样一来，他好了以后可
能还想要抱睡，然后我又要重新sleep train？有没有什么办法能避免他在生病期间重
新养成坏习惯？我实在不想再听他哭了。比如他不舒服睡不着，我也不抱睡，就在旁边
陪着他拍拍他之类，然后不一直陪，隔一会陪一下，哪怕他哼哼唧唧的闹？这样会有用
吗？以你的经验，如果病好了重新sleep train，还会像第一次那样哭的那么厉害吗？

and
consequence
,

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: to start the training 30 min later then his regular bedtime is for your and
: your child benefit. with 30 min delay, he is tired already. as a consequence
: , it will be sooner, therefore less crying, before finally sleepness takes
: over crying. it's easier for everyone.
: one thing you should trust is: sleeping is necessary for every human,
: regardless of age.
: at the beginning, your child may want to go back to the old sleeping habit,
: this desire may dominate him for a bit, but, eventually, sleepness will
: catch up, that's when he starts to learn how to fall sleep on his own.

l*h2015-01-23 08:01

14 楼

谢谢！昨天又按你说的，等到他很困的时候把他放crib，哭了一阵竟然一觉睡到早上八
点多了

and
consequence
,

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

f*w2015-01-23 08:01

15 楼

st有时候就是不work的我家的也是过了一岁后再t的两天就好了

【在 l*****h 的大作中提到】

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

16 楼

For your question, I'll give you two bullet points:
1. Even with a sleep-trained child, it doesn't mean that in your house,
every night is a peaceful and well-ordered night. This is actually true even
if there are only adults in the family. It's probably been a while that
your child was trained, so you can be your judge to testify this.
The purpose of this bullet point is to set the expectation correctly. But
certainly not to say that sleep training has no use at all.
2. In my previous post, I mentioned about how to deal with the scenario
after the child recovered from illness. Quote from Dr. Ferber's book: you
need to bring the order back to the house.
It was chaos while the child was sick. Now it's time to bring the order back
. Will the child cry? Yes. Will he cry as much as when he first gets trained
? No.
Regarding your comments about after the child's recovery, you want "实在不想
再听他哭了。比如他不舒服睡不着，我也不抱睡，就在旁边陪着他拍拍他之类，然后不
一直陪，隔一会陪一下"
I would say, please make up with your mind about whether or not you want the
kid to fall sleep and keep sleep on his own. If you haven't decided yet,
then please do not do sleep training at all, as you are torturing the child
by sending mixed message.

【在 x********a 的大作中提到】

: 这位美妈看起来很有经验啊，我搭车问个问题：我家娃现在晚上已经训好了，完全自己
: 入睡加睡整觉，但是我很担心他以后生病啊或是打疫苗了不舒服，我该怎么处理呢？看
: 你上面说应该在生病期间该怎么照顾就怎么照顾，那就是说晚上如果他不舒服，闹，那
: 么我还是要抱，如果他实在难受，我可能还要一直抱睡。但是这样一来，他好了以后可
: 能还想要抱睡，然后我又要重新sleep train？有没有什么办法能避免他在生病期间重
: 新养成坏习惯？我实在不想再听他哭了。比如他不舒服睡不着，我也不抱睡，就在旁边
: 陪着他拍拍他之类，然后不一直陪，隔一会陪一下，哪怕他哼哼唧唧的闹？这样会有用
: 吗？以你的经验，如果病好了重新sleep train，还会像第一次那样哭的那么厉害吗？
:
: and

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

17 楼

Good job! Please keep the good work going.
Also quote from Dr. Ferber's book:
It takes 3-4 days to break an old sleeping habit, so one can start a new
habit.
But it takes 2 weeks to establish a new habit.
Meaning: 2 weeks for start a new habit, reinforce it, and not fall back to
the old one easily.
Strongly recommend you to read the book. It has many things which are very
useful to you. At least one thing I already see coming based on your reply:
you want to switch the child's bedtime to the desired time. There is a
chapter just for that.
I also use the method in that chapter twice a year, during time change, so
it's a smooth change for my child.
http://www.amazon.com/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/07432

【在 l*****h 的大作中提到】

: 谢谢！昨天又按你说的，等到他很困的时候把他放crib，哭了一阵竟然一觉睡到早上八
: 点多了
:
: and
: consequence
: ,

b*32015-01-23 08:01

18 楼

狠了心的一晚上train的飘过。长痛不如短痛。第二天就自己睡了。

a*h2015-01-23 08:01

19 楼

搭车请教这位有经验的妈妈，我家宝宝为什么晚上容易训，白天nap实在是难？现在晚
上一会就睡过去了，半夜醒来也不闹，过一会能睡回去。但是白天总是哭完小睡一下又
醒来哭，断断续续不停，直到nap时间到。看到一些文章提到白天nap由大脑不同部位管
，所以可以分开训？如果没有ready的话nap可以过几个星期再试试看，是这样的吗？

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: Good job! Please keep the good work going.
: Also quote from Dr. Ferber's book:
: It takes 3-4 days to break an old sleeping habit, so one can start a new
: habit.
: But it takes 2 weeks to establish a new habit.
: Meaning: 2 weeks for start a new habit, reinforce it, and not fall back to
: the old one easily.
: Strongly recommend you to read the book. It has many things which are very
: useful to you. At least one thing I already see coming based on your reply:
: you want to switch the child's bedtime to the desired time. There is a

x*a2015-01-23 08:01

20 楼

谢谢你的详细回复！！看来以后再次train只怕是难免，毕竟生病长牙之类的事免不了
的。本来我还纠结着，看了你说的，我倒是下了决心了。干脆病了就好好陪，好了再让
他自己睡。免得病了我想陪又不敢，病好了我想训又心疼。当妈妈真的是需要理性啊。

even

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: For your question, I'll give you two bullet points:
: 1. Even with a sleep-trained child, it doesn't mean that in your house,
: every night is a peaceful and well-ordered night. This is actually true even
: if there are only adults in the family. It's probably been a while that
: your child was trained, so you can be your judge to testify this.
: The purpose of this bullet point is to set the expectation correctly. But
: certainly not to say that sleep training has no use at all.
: 2. In my previous post, I mentioned about how to deal with the scenario
: after the child recovered from illness. Quote from Dr. Ferber's book: you
: need to bring the order back to the house.

f*42015-01-23 08:01

21 楼

请教一下
有的宝宝白天困了才吃奶，吃着才睡着的如何train

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

22 楼

Refer to the chapter talking about "sleep association".

【在 f*****4 的大作中提到】

:
: 请教一下
: 有的宝宝白天困了才吃奶，吃着才睡着的如何train

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

23 楼

没有太看明白。希望能再描述下。
孩子多大？每天睡多久？nap几次，多久？nap哭，你的response是什么？
还有你说的“哭完小睡一下又醒来哭，断断续续不停，直到nap时间到“，是指nap时间
到了，他就不哭了，但也醒了？还是nap时间到了，他不哭了，就踏踏实实睡?
"Solve your child's sleeping problem" 书上是说白天和晚上的sleeping pattern /
behavior can be different. usually due to different environment (home / day
care, different caregivers, day / night). 训还是可以一块来的.

【在 a**h 的大作中提到】

: 搭车请教这位有经验的妈妈，我家宝宝为什么晚上容易训，白天nap实在是难？现在晚
: 上一会就睡过去了，半夜醒来也不闹，过一会能睡回去。但是白天总是哭完小睡一下又
: 醒来哭，断断续续不停，直到nap时间到。看到一些文章提到白天nap由大脑不同部位管
: ，所以可以分开训？如果没有ready的话nap可以过几个星期再试试看，是这样的吗？

a*h2015-01-23 08:01

24 楼

多谢回复啊。
这几天好像好些了。刚刚5个月的孩子，早上下午各一觉，晚上睡11小时左右。前几天
st的时候，nap哭，我尽量不进去看，实在哭得久就过去默默地摸摸头拍拍背一下。头
几天他哭哭睡睡到nap时间到，比如上午如果到了一个小时还醒着或在还在哭，我就抱
起来不睡了，等下午再睡。但是前几天下午还是哭哭睡睡的情况。我基本坚持一样的做
法，到时间(下午2小时)就不让睡了。这两天好多了，稍稍fight一下就能睡过去了。不
过问题还是有，就是睡不久。昨天上午nap半小时，今天45min，我觉得可以接受。昨天
下午1.5小时，也还行。不过总觉得最好上午能睡1小时，下午2.5小时。不知道学会了
自己入睡，今后会不会能睡久一些呢？

/
day

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: 没有太看明白。希望能再描述下。
: 孩子多大？每天睡多久？nap几次，多久？nap哭，你的response是什么？
: 还有你说的“哭完小睡一下又醒来哭，断断续续不停，直到nap时间到“，是指nap时间
: 到了，他就不哭了，但也醒了？还是nap时间到了，他不哭了，就踏踏实实睡?
: "Solve your child's sleeping problem" 书上是说白天和晚上的sleeping pattern /
: behavior can be different. usually due to different environment (home / day
: care, different caregivers, day / night). 训还是可以一块来的.

A*x2015-01-23 08:01

25 楼

学会自己睡,不会延长总的睡眠时间.尽管很多做父母的希望孩子多睡一些.
你的孩子睡眠时间已经算长的.从书上给的数据,average total sleep =12.5, 9 hours
during night, 2 day time naps with variable length.
the typical total sleep per day is 11.5 - 13.5.

【在 a**h 的大作中提到】

: 多谢回复啊。
: 这几天好像好些了。刚刚5个月的孩子，早上下午各一觉，晚上睡11小时左右。前几天
: st的时候，nap哭，我尽量不进去看，实在哭得久就过去默默地摸摸头拍拍背一下。头
: 几天他哭哭睡睡到nap时间到，比如上午如果到了一个小时还醒着或在还在哭，我就抱
: 起来不睡了，等下午再睡。但是前几天下午还是哭哭睡睡的情况。我基本坚持一样的做
: 法，到时间(下午2小时)就不让睡了。这两天好多了，稍稍fight一下就能睡过去了。不
: 过问题还是有，就是睡不久。昨天上午nap半小时，今天45min，我觉得可以接受。昨天
: 下午1.5小时，也还行。不过总觉得最好上午能睡1小时，下午2.5小时。不知道学会了
: 自己入睡，今后会不会能睡久一些呢？
:

a*h2015-01-23 08:01

26 楼

哦，稍觉安慰。主要是看了CLB，受其影响。晚上就睡不到12小时，白天也不到书里提
到的时间，而且基本天天如此，不免有些担心。谢谢答疑。

hours

【在 A******x 的大作中提到】

: 学会自己睡,不会延长总的睡眠时间.尽管很多做父母的希望孩子多睡一些.
: 你的孩子睡眠时间已经算长的.从书上给的数据,average total sleep =12.5, 9 hours
: during night, 2 day time naps with variable length.
: the typical total sleep per day is 11.5 - 13.5.

x*92015-01-23 08:01

27 楼

真的要让孩子哭着睡吗？真舍不得
请看看下面的链接
http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MjM5OTMxNDk4MQ==&mid=202368575&