OK,NYC,WS,you should've heard about this joke from 2007, about gold diggers and depreciate assets. It explains the "Lots of dating" reality.
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What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly
beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm not from New
York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million
a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is
middle class in New York City , so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.Are
there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you
send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 100 - 150
. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 150,000 won't get me to
central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an
investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor
is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her
level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings
-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side
so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to
offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls
in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker,
doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out?
Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE
ONLY
Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way.
Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it.
I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match
them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
--------------------THE ANSWER----------
Dear Pers-:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about
your dilemma.
I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting
your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than
$500K per year. That said here's how I see it.Your offer, from the
prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal.
Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade
here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into
perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is
an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!So, in
economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not
only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates!
Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5
years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick
a fork in you!So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position,
not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good
business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather
lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my
money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out
. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I
wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you
has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if
you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if
not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we
wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.With all that said, I must
say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."I hope
this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me
know.
Rob Campbell
J.P.Morgan Diversified Industrials Investment
Banking
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this joke makes perfect sense to whom want to trade for a marriage.
say
to
so
hurry