I guess the reason he did not beat me just because i may earn more money
than him since my major allows me to find a job relative easily than him.
When he came to visit me each day he was angry if I did not prepare food in
time. He say "F... U" all the time, even sent me in emails. However, he
looks he does love me. He arranges some time for me to revise what I wrote.
When he wants to talk, he may call me.
I do not how other long distance couples deal with living trivals and how to
communicate with each other. But he seldom contacts me. Usually one week we
have 3 phone calls and spend 40min in sum. But he does like to talk with
his sisters and sisters' husbands all the time. When they are talking, he
refuses me to stay with him together. After some phone calls, I was blamed
why I gave money to my parents before I married to him. He said just because
I did not save too much money, we have no way to pay the down pay of a
house. However, his parents did not give any money on our wedding. I told
him that it is wired I never asked why your parents did not give any gift or
financial support for our marriage, as a man why you keep asking me this
question. Do you really think I should bring a certain number of money to
cheer you and your family up if I agree to marry you?
Besides, when he was talking with his friends through qq or msn, he made
sure let me stay outside of his room. If I use his computer he will
accompany me all the time. However, one time i saw he wrote with other girl
and said he felt so disappointed about our marriage and want to give up.
They chatted through video several times. Only the time he chatted with his
sisters’ husbands is much more than the total time he offered to me. I know
he uses a lot time to erase those records. I do not know whether this is
bearable or not for a long distance marriage. He never tells me his feeling
about our marriage.
I so scare if I really have a baby with him in the future and then he told me that he
does not love me anymore. I am not that confident on our marriage, although
I know I love him so much. After I married him, I respect him and want him to
love me like before we got marry. I see him as my teacher, my partner, my son. Sometime, he was touched by my love to him. But after 10 min, he thinks what I did is what I
should do and he have no feel about what did for him.
I really scare to talk with him. I dare not to answer his phone call since I
know he will blame me for all bad things he may experience. I knew if i
call him he may hang off without any patient. After raining days, there are
always some sunshine. Suddenly, he may talk to me happily and call me honey.
I do not know. I do not know what I should do. I really scare and avoid
thinking these things which may happen in the future between us. I love him,
but I do not want to be hurt by him someday, hardly....
