Reading the reviews of Time Warner Cable on YELP just made# Joke - 肚皮舞运动
b*e
1 楼
听起来都是有contract,有什么区别吗？
s*r
2 楼
http://www.yelp.com/biz/time-warner-cable-new-york-2
Raven B.
Brooklyn, NY
1.0 star rating
2/25/2013
Oh my god. Oh. My. Gawd. I don't know where to start. I guess I should start
with me: I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot because I've been with Time Warner for
7 years even though I knew they were terrible from the first week. That's
like being in a 7 year relationship with somebody you knew you hated the
moment you met them. So I'm stupid. But Time Warner? They're evil. No, not
evil, they're DIABOLICAL as in: they embody the aspect of the Devil.
What's so bad about them? I guess first and foremost is that their service
simply doesn't work. I mean, it's not really a service. A "service" would
imply that it provides something to you. All Time Warner provides is a
reason to be angry. With Time Warner you get internet around 40% of the time
. Would you go to a restaurant where you got service 40% of the time? Would
you ride in an airplane that only worked 40% of the time? No, you wouldn't!
Not unless you were so stupid that you literally deserved to die. Why on
earth would you settle for an internet provider that only worked 40% of the
time?
At least Time Warner has a motive: they are sadistic and hate their
customers and so they want them to be forced to experience the next rung of
their hellish gauntlet: customer service.
Once you eventually go insane and call customer service because your
internet isn't working you are subjected to a voice recording that claims
to understand full sentences but actually does not. After about 5 minutes of
yelling at a machine you are eventually transferred to a meek, soulless
little man who Time Warner employs as a human shield. This man has no
knowledge or power. His entire job is to:
A.) Temper your rage against Time Warner by being so pitiful and miserable
and ignorant that you start to feel sorry for him instead of being furious
at his hateful masters and
B.) Draw out the call as long as possible in order to drain your vitality
and endurance.
If you are able to make it past this man, you will be placed on hold again
for anywhere between 5 and 20 minutes.
Should you decide to not hang up you will eventually reach an advanced "
Technical Expert". These people have been instructed by Time Warner to use
passive aggressive techniques and tedious troubleshooting walkthroughs to
exhaust your momentum and cause you to question your own sanity. If you have
a 3rd party router they will treat you like a rapist.
If you make it past these people Time Warner will play its trump card and
set up an appointment with a technician to come out and physically swap out
your faulty, broken modem for another, identical faulty, broken modem. (I
believe The technicians use the old modems to swap out for the next broken
modem in the chain).
This does nothing other than to set in motion ROUND 2 which essentially
consists of running the above circuit again only with slightly different
people and with slightly less energy. In this way Time Warner slowly bleeds
you dry until you eventually become too tired and give up and end up writing
a three page Yelp review instead of actually taking to the streets.
I hate you Time Warner. I hate you with every fiber of my living being. My
family hates you. My kids will hate you and God willing my descendants will
find a way to stop you. May your empire crumble and your servers be consumed
with the fire of the righteous.
Was this review …?
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Raven B.
Brooklyn, NY
1.0 star rating
2/25/2013
Oh my god. Oh. My. Gawd. I don't know where to start. I guess I should start
with me: I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot because I've been with Time Warner for
7 years even though I knew they were terrible from the first week. That's
like being in a 7 year relationship with somebody you knew you hated the
moment you met them. So I'm stupid. But Time Warner? They're evil. No, not
evil, they're DIABOLICAL as in: they embody the aspect of the Devil.
What's so bad about them? I guess first and foremost is that their service
simply doesn't work. I mean, it's not really a service. A "service" would
imply that it provides something to you. All Time Warner provides is a
reason to be angry. With Time Warner you get internet around 40% of the time
. Would you go to a restaurant where you got service 40% of the time? Would
you ride in an airplane that only worked 40% of the time? No, you wouldn't!
Not unless you were so stupid that you literally deserved to die. Why on
earth would you settle for an internet provider that only worked 40% of the
time?
At least Time Warner has a motive: they are sadistic and hate their
customers and so they want them to be forced to experience the next rung of
their hellish gauntlet: customer service.
Once you eventually go insane and call customer service because your
internet isn't working you are subjected to a voice recording that claims
to understand full sentences but actually does not. After about 5 minutes of
yelling at a machine you are eventually transferred to a meek, soulless
little man who Time Warner employs as a human shield. This man has no
knowledge or power. His entire job is to:
A.) Temper your rage against Time Warner by being so pitiful and miserable
and ignorant that you start to feel sorry for him instead of being furious
at his hateful masters and
B.) Draw out the call as long as possible in order to drain your vitality
and endurance.
If you are able to make it past this man, you will be placed on hold again
for anywhere between 5 and 20 minutes.
Should you decide to not hang up you will eventually reach an advanced "
Technical Expert". These people have been instructed by Time Warner to use
passive aggressive techniques and tedious troubleshooting walkthroughs to
exhaust your momentum and cause you to question your own sanity. If you have
a 3rd party router they will treat you like a rapist.
If you make it past these people Time Warner will play its trump card and
set up an appointment with a technician to come out and physically swap out
your faulty, broken modem for another, identical faulty, broken modem. (I
believe The technicians use the old modems to swap out for the next broken
modem in the chain).
This does nothing other than to set in motion ROUND 2 which essentially
consists of running the above circuit again only with slightly different
people and with slightly less energy. In this way Time Warner slowly bleeds
you dry until you eventually become too tired and give up and end up writing
a three page Yelp review instead of actually taking to the streets.
I hate you Time Warner. I hate you with every fiber of my living being. My
family hates you. My kids will hate you and God willing my descendants will
find a way to stop you. May your empire crumble and your servers be consumed
with the fire of the righteous.
Was this review …?
Useful (2)
Funny (3)
Cool (1)
b*e
3 楼
ding!
【在 b*e 的大作中提到】
: 听起来都是有contract,有什么区别吗？
【在 b*e 的大作中提到】
: 听起来都是有contract,有什么区别吗？
n*5
4 楼
我的亲身经历是，用了一年关户，多交了1个月的月费，然后在一年半的时间内，Time
Warner 陆陆续续给我邮寄了6张check, 名字全是错的，而且错的全一个样。我现在对
这几十块钱能不能要回来已经不报希望了。
Warner 陆陆续续给我邮寄了6张check, 名字全是错的，而且错的全一个样。我现在对
这几十块钱能不能要回来已经不报希望了。
s*r
5 楼
只能用TWC的人真是伤不起啊。我上周一共做了3次预约MODEM都换了2个了现在还动不动
掉线打客服电话老是SERVICE OUTAGE。尼妹的MODEM还要交钱。。怀念OPTIMUM~
掉线打客服电话老是SERVICE OUTAGE。尼妹的MODEM还要交钱。。怀念OPTIMUM~
d*t
6 楼
还好吧，我TWC用到现在没啥问题，倒是听说att和comcast drama不断
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: 只能用TWC的人真是伤不起啊。我上周一共做了3次预约MODEM都换了2个了现在还动不动
: 掉线打客服电话老是SERVICE OUTAGE。尼妹的MODEM还要交钱。。怀念OPTIMUM~
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: 只能用TWC的人真是伤不起啊。我上周一共做了3次预约MODEM都换了2个了现在还动不动
: 掉线打客服电话老是SERVICE OUTAGE。尼妹的MODEM还要交钱。。怀念OPTIMUM~
s*r
7 楼
http://www.businessinsider.com/most-hated-companies-america-201
都不咋地
【在 d**********t 的大作中提到】
: 还好吧，我TWC用到现在没啥问题，倒是听说att和comcast drama不断
都不咋地
【在 d**********t 的大作中提到】
: 还好吧，我TWC用到现在没啥问题，倒是听说att和comcast drama不断
b*n
8 楼
omg
我现在正从att往twc跳呢
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: http://www.businessinsider.com/most-hated-companies-america-201
: 都不咋地
我现在正从att往twc跳呢
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: http://www.businessinsider.com/most-hated-companies-america-201
: 都不咋地
s*r
9 楼
慎重。。我这TWC local service outage一下午了还没修好，现在只能Att的手机上网啊
【在 b*****n 的大作中提到】
: omg
: 我现在正从att往twc跳呢
【在 b*****n 的大作中提到】
: omg
: 我现在正从att往twc跳呢
s*a
10 楼
you can cash a check if the name is slightly wrong. i did it before with my
local bank. they just asked me to write down the correction and sign next to
it.
Time
【在 n*****5 的大作中提到】
: 我的亲身经历是，用了一年关户，多交了1个月的月费，然后在一年半的时间内，Time
: Warner 陆陆续续给我邮寄了6张check, 名字全是错的，而且错的全一个样。我现在对
: 这几十块钱能不能要回来已经不报希望了。
local bank. they just asked me to write down the correction and sign next to
it.
Time
【在 n*****5 的大作中提到】
: 我的亲身经历是，用了一年关户，多交了1个月的月费，然后在一年半的时间内，Time
: Warner 陆陆续续给我邮寄了6张check, 名字全是错的，而且错的全一个样。我现在对
: 这几十块钱能不能要回来已经不报希望了。
p*t
11 楼
这些TV/Internet service provider 都一个鸟样
压根没有什么竞争鸭梨
start
for
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: http://www.businessinsider.com/most-hated-companies-america-201
: 都不咋地
压根没有什么竞争鸭梨
start
for
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: http://www.businessinsider.com/most-hated-companies-america-201
: 都不咋地
s*r
12 楼
都超过一天了还没修好...FUCK YOU TWC!!!
网啊
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: 慎重。。我这TWC local service outage一下午了还没修好，现在只能Att的手机上网啊
网啊
【在 s********r 的大作中提到】
: 慎重。。我这TWC local service outage一下午了还没修好，现在只能Att的手机上网啊
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