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unidentified_title# Joke - 肚皮舞运动

d*k2095-12-31 08:12

1 楼

今天去参加一个活动，没带相机，想给宝宝照张照片，正好有个认识的妈妈带女儿也在
，请她帮忙照，她答应了，结果等轮到我们的时候，这个妈妈不见人影了。回来后郁闷
了这半天。

R*t2095-12-31 08:12

2 楼

主副面试完，面试官说通过了。不一会状态变为‘new card is being produced’. 下
午的时候又变成了‘case approval was certified by uscis’，读了邮件感觉有点怪
，内容如下。请大家帮忙分析一下是什么情况。多谢！
Receipt Number: ***
Application Type: I485, APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO
ADJUST STATUS
Your Case Status: Initial Review
On May 3, 2017, we certified the approval of your Form I485, APPLICATION TO
REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS, Receipt Number
LIN1690861719, and sent it to the appropriate appellate office. That office
will send you a final decision. If you move, go to www.uscis.gov/
addresschange to give us your new mailing address.
During this step, USCIS initiates the background checks of the applicant/
petitioner and identifies issues that may need to be addressed either during
an interview or by asking the applicant/petitioner to submit additional
information or documentation. USCIS reviews the applicant's/petitioner's
criminal history, determines if there are national security concerns that
need to be addressed, and reviews the application/petition for fraud
indicators. If you have filed an I-485, I-589, I-751, N-400, I-90, I-821, I-
131 or I-765, you can expect to receive an appointment notice to appear at
an Application Support Center to have your fingerprints and/or photographs
taken. The timing of your appointment is determined by the number of
applicants ahead of you that also need a biometric appointment. We try to
schedule biometric appointments as quickly as possible and in most cases you
will receive your appointment notice within 30 days of submitting your
application. We will send your appointment notice approximately 14 days
ahead of your scheduled appointment. It is important that you keep this
appointment. If absolutely necessary, you can request that your appointment
be rescheduled however, please be aware that rescheduling may delay the
processing of your application. Please follow the instructions on your
appointment notice if you need to reschedule. Occasionally, you may receive
an appointment notice to appear at an Application Support Center to have
your fingerprints taken when you have filed a form other than those listed
above. In these situations, you may receive your appointment notice more
than 30 days after submitting your application or petition.

u*r2095-12-31 08:12

3 楼

发信人： mobro(他二舅), 信区： Joke
标题：正要外出办事，一女同事主动提出开车送我去
发信站： BBS未名空间站(Thu Sep 21 09:58:44 2017,GMT)
1.记得上高中有一天晚上停电，班主任进来说：“同学们，期末临近大家这段时间辛
苦了，趁着停电睡会。”不知道我当时怎么想的就冒出来一句：“老师你讲课吧，不讲
课我们睡不着。。。”想想我当时胆子真大。。。
2.正要外出办事，一女同事主动提出开车送我去。我要去的地方并不远，就跟她说:不
用了。但她坚持要送，还说同事间互相帮助是应该的…… 进了停车场，走到她的车旁
，她忽然说:“哎呦，你看，左前轮漏气了，你能不能先帮我换一下轮胎啊？”
3.和男生合租房子，马桶永远不敢坐，没办法的时候就垫一圈儿卫生纸，今天早上到公
司，电梯里，一个妹子拍拍我肩膀，小声跟我说：“你屁股上好像粘了张纸……” 于
是我一摸，果然从短裤裤腿里拉出来一条长达20公分的卫生纸……电梯里当场就有个吃
早餐的吐了。。。
4.夫妻俩离婚争孩子，在法庭上，妻子理直气壮坦白：孩子从我肚子里生出来的，当然
归我了。丈夫愤怒的说：简直是胡说八道，取款机出来的钱能归取款机吗？还不是谁插
卡归谁。法官当场晕倒，连律师都佩服。妻子接着说：如果出来的是假币你要吗？在场
的人都晕倒至今未醒……
5.下班回家看到一卖西瓜的，问大叔：“大叔西瓜怎么卖？”大叔人很热情乐呵呵地说
：“便宜了啊，六毛五一斤。”我摸摸自己的口袋的钱说：“大叔，给我来一斤！”
6.记得当年和老婆谈恋爱，第一次和他出去，去服装店时，一个店员说：这么短时间又
换了啊，我一看不认识她啊，刚要解释。我老婆说到，是啊前天换的...