真心求教：以婚姻为目的的交往 - 未名空间MITBBS历史存档

h*22014-08-31 07:08

1 楼

A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
.
Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this
relationship.
Any person from a man's angle to share some thoughts? Is it possible that
this situation will change after they decide to get married?

L*y2014-08-31 07:08

2 楼

Honestly speaking, I will never marry such an old woman.
It is OK to be friends or even live together, but no more.

more
them

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

l*12014-08-31 07:08

3 楼

交往一年还没有身体接触？这也不正常啊, 年轻人也不行啊, 别说到了40岁的年龄了,
该享受人生啊, 而且不尝试的话女方如果有需求还以为这位男士不行呢, 如果互相对
对方身体没什么冲动、没什么兴趣, 也很难相信这两个人有爱情, 除非你们是
网聊了一年, 那也得近距离生活一下, 才能知道对方让人不满意的地方能不能接受, 两
个人能不能走到一起, 只要你们之间互相达到了对方的满意度, 就能结婚啊, 包括经济
、性格、价值观...很多方面, 你们自己最了解情况了, 在这不疼不痒地问有什么用

k*42014-08-31 07:08

4 楼

I did it when I was young and stupid, I had acne and took
female hormones to treat it , no libido at all.

more
them

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

n*72014-08-31 07:08

5 楼

你是男的还是女的？我猜是女的

t*32014-08-31 07:08

6 楼

看起来一方是性冷淡。

n*g2014-08-31 07:08

7 楼

好啊

are
with
introvert
that

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

z*s2014-08-31 07:08

8 楼

人于人差异很大。楼主这种情况正常吧。心灵的沟通更重要。

z*s2014-08-31 07:08

9 楼

结婚后应该更亲密。再像这样就不正常。

z*s2014-08-31 07:08

10 楼

这要看双方都愿意承担将来的责任，结婚是一辈子的事。
慎重承诺。一旦承诺就要有担当的勇气。
任何人的结婚前和结婚后都会感觉差异很大。
婚前更浪漫。婚后的会更具体的面临许多生活细节，
即使是很想爱的伴侣也面对。
所以这要问你自己是不是对他／她有信心，有faith？
这只有当事人知道。

a*82014-08-31 07:08

11 楼

对于你的问题“Does love require physical contact”，我觉得是相爱的人会渴望有
physical contact，否则和做普通好朋友有什么区别？

are
with
introvert
that

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

s*12014-08-31 07:08

12 楼

如果双方有好感会自然而然的有身体接触吧，40多也不算老，就算是老人，没有性欲了
，身体接触还是需要的。

y*w2014-08-31 07:08

13 楼

40的从没结婚的女人？这是什么样的女人，

are

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

i*02014-08-31 07:08

14 楼

Honestly speaking, I will never marry such an old woman.
It is OK to be friends or even live together, but no more.

s*t2014-08-31 07:08

15 楼

Of course, love needs physical contact. 四十几岁是男人的性能力很好的时候，因
为有足够的经验。接触一年都没有这样的接触，你以后即使结婚也会觉得很平淡，平淡
得让你窒息。
这个男人很有可能性能力有问题。或者他就是把你当作一个谈伴

are
with
introvert
that

【在 h**********2 的大作中提到】

: A man and a women are dating exclusively for 1 year. Both of them are in
: their early 40s. The man divorced and the women is never married. They are
: highly educated and knowledgeable. Both of them are looking for a serious
: long-term relationship. When they meet face to face in weekly frequency,
: they just chat and have something common to chat. They never hold hand with
: each other and no physical contacts, probably because they are too introvert
: .
: Does love require physical contact? Anyone have known any similar cases that
: lead to a successful marriage? At this age should they not wish for too
: much? As both of them are old, they can not spend many years on this

M*s2014-08-31 07:08

16 楼

X

h*22014-08-31 07:08

17 楼

没看懂

【在 M********s 的大作中提到】

: X

d*g2014-08-31 07:08

18 楼

For a year without any hug or cuddle, it should be dead in the water.
I don't think either party has that intention to go physical, giving the
condition that both are straight man and woman.
Usually man takes charge in leading into the physical stage, but this guy,
obviously , is hesitating or even not interested.
Take a step back, cut communication with the man for a while, and see what
would happen.